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INTAKE, in the past seven days. 923 assessments on file. 5 subjects admitted in 24 hours.

Gushers
assessed 2 out of 10
A Creeper (Minecraft)
assessed 0 out of 10
Squidward Tentacles' Nose
assessed 10 out of 10
Music Festivals
assessed 3 out of 10
Ticketmaster Service Fees
assessed 1 out of 10
The Sunday Scaries
assessed 0 out of 10
Getting Kicked Out of the Bar
assessed 0 out of 10
Getting Ghosted
assessed 0 out of 10
Juul
assessed 10 out of 10
Big Mouth Billy Bass (1999)
assessed 2 out of 10
The Brave Little Toaster Goes to Mars
assessed 3 out of 10
Zordon
assessed 0 out of 10
Avicii Debuting "Levels" (2011)
assessed 1 out of 10
Scientology
assessed 1 out of 10
WOULD YOUGOON?
GLOBAL INSTITUTE OF GOONABILITY RESEARCH
RESEARCH SUBJECT #09843
An Escalator That Works
Plate 1 — Photo: Basile Morin, CC BY-SA 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons

Infrastructure

An Escalator That Works

Operational. Ascending.

RESEARCH NOTES

A moving staircase observed in its intended state, carrying riders rather than serving as an unusually tall set of stairs. The word escalator began as a trademark of the Otis Elevator Company and was ruled a generic term in 1950.

Would You Goon?

0 = ABSOLUTELY NOT · 10 = UNCONDITIONALLY

Plate credit Photo: Basile Morin, CC BY-SA 4.0, via Wikimedia Commons · Source · License